We Use to Walk Like That
by shoret
Summary: James and Lily have been married for a few months now, but everything isn't how it should be. JP/LE Complete!


DISCLAIMER: Anything you recognize isn't mine besides I am a poor college student who owns nothing so suing me would be pointless.

WUtWLT

We Use to Walk Like That

WUtWLT

The wind swept stray hairs into her face as she surveyed the lake. The lake's surface was a perfect mirror of the ice blue sky. The leaves would be falling soon covering the world in a patchwork quilt of reds and oranges. They would fall, but not yet just as her tears would. She should be getting home. He would be worried about her no matter how much she told him to leave her alone. Just as she was about to turn around and walk back to their house she saw a couple on the opposite side of the lake. They shouldn't have caught her eye since all they were doing was walking the worn dirt path circling the lake, but it was the way that they were walking that made her stop. They were hand in hand. When was the last time she had walked hand in hand? A tear made a single streak down her passive face.

"Lily." She turned at the sound of her name her eyes tracing the couple's path until the last possible second. He was standing ten paces away from her; his imposing figure sliced through the dieing rays of the sun. How long had they been like this? How long had they been close enough to step into the other's arms yet didn't? How long had they been strangers?

"Remember when we use to walk like that?" Lily asked looking back at the couple across the lake. Although she had her back to him she knew his eyes were slightly squinted and his head cocked to one side in thought. She knew his facial gestures better than her own. She knew his facial gestures better than anyone's. It was one of the few things she still knew about him. There was once a day when she could honestly say she knew more about him than anyone else did. That day was gone. He didn't have an answer. It had been too long if he had an answer he would have said it by now.

He kept silent, contemplating her. He had no clue where she was going with this. He wanted her to come back home. He wanted his wife back. He wanted everything that had happened in the last four months to go away. He wanted his life back, but he didn't know how to do that so he kept quiet.

"We were young and quite naive." She said as he stepped up behind her.

"Not much has changed then has it? Sure we're a few years older and have gained a little more knowledge but other than that we are still the same." He said trying to remember how close they had been.

"The most important thing has changed though. We don't love each other anymore." She closed her eyes so the tears wouldn't spill from them. He didn't love her anymore. All he loved was his job and his status to other people. How could he love her when all he cared about was himself?

Did she honestly believe that? Did she think he didn't love her, his own wife? She was everything to him. He's been in love with her since first year. She was the reason he continued to slave away at a job he hated and try to impress people he didn't give a damn about. The ministry was so corrupt these days that just being there made him sick yet he still went for her. She was his life … or she use to be until she hid herself from him. "Do you really believe that?" he asked keeping all emotion out of his voice.

She shredding the last ounce of hope he had left for them when she said "I know it." How had they come to this? They couldn't be over. They were James and Lily, always joined. It was never just James or just Lily. They were always passionate whether in love or hate. They weren't detached like this. They didn't hid there emotions behind indifference like this. She would start yelling at him soon. She had to start yelling at him soon or else he might actually believe they were over. He waited. He waited for her to show some strong emotion, any strong emotion. She didn't. All she did was watch the couple across the lake as he walked away.

She stayed at the lake until the sun set then made her trek home. It wasn't really a home though anymore. Now it was just a place were they slept. The lock turned and the door opened on a small three bedroom house. Lily remembered how excited they were when they came home to the empty house on their first night there. James had made the worst tasting Mac' and Cheese she had ever tried and they ate on the kitchen floor because the furniture hadn't arrived yet. It was one of the best nights of her life. James didn't care that they were eating on the floor or that he was cooking instead the wife unlike her family. If her mother could have seen them she would have had a conniption. 'Proper young ladies don't were jeans.' 'Proper young ladies don't watch sports' 'Proper young ladies don't marry freaks.' She wasn't a proper young lady apparently.

It wasn't until Lily got to the bedroom that she realized something was wrong. James stood in the middle of the room packing his bags. "You're leaving?" Lily questioned not believing her eyes. Maybe he didn't love her anymore and she didn't know him, but he couldn't leave her. She needed him. Without him she didn't make sense. Without him she was just a unloved witch who left her family and comfortable life because she was selfish and ungrateful. Without him she was just an odd girl who said weird things and had weird views of love. Without him she was only half a person. He had never not been part of her life, not once.

"Yeah I figured it was for the best. I'm gunna move in with Sirius for a little while." He put garment after garment into the bag. Lily's eyes followed each article of clothing as it disappeared into the duffel.

"Why?" She watched as his favorite jeans disappeared into the duffel.

"You were right at the lake," he stated adding 'you don't love me' in his head.

She wanted to yell that she wasn't right. She wanted to tell him that she needed him and that he was an idiot for listening to her. She wanted to make him stay and point out that he had never listened to her before why should he do so now. Mostly she wanted to cry. Instead though she straightened her spine and reverted to her old bitchy self, "Good go be his problem; I've already wasted enough time on you. I should have listened when my mother told me you were a good for nothing talent less freak."

He paused and looked at her for the first time since she entered the room. Her hair was wind swept and her cheeks and nose were still a little pink from the elements, but the only thing he noticed was her eyes. Her eyes held that passion that had been missing for the past four months. She still loved him. She couldn't look at him with that much hate and anger if she didn't still feel things for him. Looking at her closely he could see that she was terrified, terrified and desperate. She would never bring up her family or say she agreed with something they said if she wasn't. She still loved him and that was all that mattered right now.

James stepped towards her. She stepped back. She shouldn't have said that. She had crossed the line. He took another step forward and Lily took another back. She knew he wouldn't hurt her but he looked at her as if she were his prey. A shiver ran down her spine and she couldn't tell if it were good or not. Again he stepped forward. Again she stepped back. Her back brushed against the wall softly. She had no where else to go. James stepped forward again and flush against her. They hadn't touched in four months and it was almost too much for Lily to take.

"Do you really mean that Lily? Do you think I'm talent less?" James' hand trailed down her arm and eyes down her body letting her know he wasn't talking about what his job at the ministry anymore.

Her eyes closed as she whispered, "No".

James loved her best like this, all soft and breathy. He loved the fact that he was the only one who ever got to see her like this. This part of her was his and only his. "Look at me, Lily" James murmured into her hair making her shiver. Lily's eyes connected with his and he asked, "Do you want me to stay, Lily?"

She couldn't think when he said her name like that. He turned her into quivering mush. She somehow managed to nod her head and say a quiet yes, never once breaking eye contact. His face exploded into a smile; she loved his smile it was so uninhibited just like him. She missed that smile; she missed that him and she couldn't help but wonder were he had gone. His eyebrows furrowed and he said, "I didn't go anywhere".

Apparently she had spoken the last part out loud.

"You changed." Lily started, "You started spending all of your time at your job trying to climb the ladder and you care so much about what everyone there thinks about you now."

He laughed. Was he laughing at her? How dare he laugh at … "I was doing all of that for you baby. I was trying to give you the best life possible. I was trying to give you what your parents did. Is that why you shut me out of your life?" His thumb stroked her cheek and bottom lip while she processed the information.

"But … but … I hated that life. You know how they treated me, treated magic. Why would you do that?"

"I thought it was what you would want later on. I thought you would want a successful politician husband with a big house and a maid and nanny. I wanted to be good enough for you. I didn't want to lose you" James spilled all of his pent up fears about there marriage in one long rush, eyes downcast as he waited for her reply.

She was shocked. They had almost split up because he wanted the best for her. She couldn't help it, she started laughing. "You dofus, I don't want any of that. I never will. All I want is my husband back; my bad cooking, incorrigible, juvenile, ridiculously handsome husband."

"I don't know if I should be offended or not" James asked as a lopsided smile snuck onto his face.

"I think not" Lily joked as she kissed him, really heart and soul kissed him, for the first time in four months. They were James and Lily again. She made sense again. Suddenly her mind wandered back to the lake. "You were right."

"Naturally." James joked, "So what am I right about this time? With all of the occurrences which one are you referring to?"

She smiled. "About us. Not much has changed."

James thought for a second trying to understand what Lily was talking about until it hit him that she was talking about what they felt for each other. She was talking about how things between them at the beginning of their relationship hadn't changed. "The important things haven't changed."

WUtWLT

A/N: This was actually an original story I wrote then decided that it would be a cute JP/LE story so I changed it. I did play around with Lily's family life a little because I thought it would add more if Lily's parents were like her sister. I hope you enjoyed it!


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